Virgin.net - City Guides - Glasgow

By Chantal Martineau

It may have been considered an industrial wasteland until the Eighties, but these days Glasgow is considered to be the coolest city in Britain. Sorry, Londoners. It's official...

In 1990, it was voted a European City of Culture. In 1999, it was won the title of UK City of Architecture and Design. And in a recent survey conducted by The Big Issue, it was officially branded the coolest city in Britain. Glasgow has come a long way since the days of mass unemployment and urban crime waves. Today, as the third most popular tourist destination for foreigners in the UK, Scotland's "other city" is recognised as an arts centre and clubbing Mecca. But don't worry you pretty wee heids, lads and lasses: gentrification hasn't killed that good ol' Glaswegian hospitality.

They say it's the "most Scottish" of Scottish cities. Who "they" are and how Scottishness is measured remains a mystery to me, but if friendliness of the locals, blackness of the humour and indecipherability of the accent are anything to go by, I would say they just might be right. I was in the cab

three minutes by the time I'd asked the driver to repeat himself for the eighth time. He didn't seem to mind, though. Neither did the shop assistants, waiters and receptionist at the hotel. Unlike natives of tourist-infested London and Edinburgh, Glaswegians seem to bask in their newfound fame.

The city's infamous two-fingers-to-pomposity sense of humour still gets confused - and may well have been born of - its reputation as a rough, sooty troublemaker's haven. Most visitors - be they patriotic Englishmen or irony-deprived Americans - are appalled when they come across the Duke of Wellington statue right outside the Gallery of Modern Art. The statue (and/or its horse) has been unabashedly sporting a bright orange traffic cone for the better part of the last decade. Not even the Lord Provost will let the thing be taken off now.

But this most basic of student pranks isn't what has been steadily pulling in the trendy weekend-break set over the last few years. Glasgow's utilitarian-yet-avant-garde contrast is what gets culture junkies excited. Charles Rennie Mackintosh buildings were being torn down until the Eighties when suddenly it dawned on his hometown that he might be one of the fathers of modernism in the UK. Completely unappreciated in Scotland during his own time, he found success in Vienna, Moscow and

consistently cutting-edge Berlin but died nearly penniless in London. Today, the School or Art, his most famous building, epitomises Glasgow's contradicting personalities. While exclusive groups of stuffy art appreciators mill about the building oohing and aahing, wild-haired students covered in paint and plaster bowl them over in the halls trying to make it to lectures on time. "How quaint yet deliciously sacrilegious that a place of art can also double as a practical and operating institution," you hear them mutter to each other. Whatever.

The Mackintosh (and Mockintosh, referring to Mackintosh-inspired prints and designs) that litters the city is complemented by a frenetic nightlife that, even by Berlin and Reykjavik standards, is nothing to sniff at. Glasgow's notoriety as a base for brawlers has all but disappeared paving the way for its new title as the glitzy, ghetto-chic must-do gig on every reputable dj's hit list. But the city's infamy as the home of the Glasgae Kiss (a head-butt, commonly used in drunken scraps) is not far enough behind it yet - a 1am curfew is still imposed on late-night establishments. Clubs can stay open till the wee hours, but getting in after 1am is unlikely, especially if you've had one too many a swally.

As in all Northern places - and not to lose face with famed-for-festivals

sister city, Edinburgh - Glaswegians make the most of their summers by packing in a good few street parties. Maydaze, in early May, is a modern arts and dance celebration, the West End Festival of music and the arts, the city's biggest party, runs for two weeks in June and the International Jazz Festival is held in July. But the weather is less than reliable and there's not really a best time to visit. Whenever you go, you'd do well to arm yourself with a few key phrases just to help you understand the locals. In case you don't ken (know) any upstanding Glaswegians, I've done the dirty work for you:

• "A wee upsy-doonsy" is a drink or pint. It refers to the motion of lifting the glass up and down.
• A "poke" is a bag of chips or sweets.
• "She's a braw lassie" means "she is a beautiful woman."
• "Yer in fir a tankin'" is a way to psyche-out an opponent before a football match. It means "you're going to lose badly."
• A "carry-oot" is the alcohol you purchase in an off-licence; it refers to carrying out the booze.

Note: these are old slang terms and might only still be used by elderly men and people living south of the river.

 
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